Monday, July 25, 2016

20,000 Emails Under the DNC (Good Wife Season 5 Spoiler, sorta)


Emails, Emails, Emails. It seems that the Democrats have a leakage problem.  Days before the Hillary Coronation Event, otherwise known as the Democratic National Convention, an email server sprung a leak, and all of a sudden, everyone is in an uproar about the Democratic Party strategizing against Bernie Sanders in the Presidential Primaries this year.  This isn't some regular "uproar" where people get their undergarments all knotted and twisted. The knotting and twisting has completely taken over the outergarments as well and is threatening bodily accessories items like neckties and iWatches.

Immediate casualties seem to be minimal. Debbie Wasserman Schultz is resigning and being booed everywhere she goes. And Hillary falls down a small hole that she is more than capable of crawling out of as long as those folks in power are still able to come through on their promise to give her a shot at being crowned President.

Bernie Sanders is handling it as well as he could. It's like he was always the kid picked last for a basketball team in gym class, and this time he was picked second because all the cool kids were rooting for him liked they rooted for Rudy Ruettiger at Notre Dame. Then, all of sudden after the emails leaked, he realized that he might have actually gotten picked first if it wasn't for the P.E. teacher and that one guy who smelled like beef stew by the end of the day.

Oddly enough, Bernie seems to be enjoying the uproar and hearing everyone's voices get higher and louder on talk shows. He's made mention of the resignation and seems to think that's a good idea, but he's laying pretty low at this point. He's playing it smart because he's the martyr in all of this, and it's elevating him from the position of a "defeated underdog" to a "legitimate contender" in the eyes of a lot of hopeless 99-percenters, which, if you count it all up, is about 9 percent of us.

My biggest concern in all of this is not the act of colluding against competitors or even the leaking/hacking of the emails. The concern is the fact that public seems legitimately surprised that this was happening. Watch the Good Wife.  It will be eye opening and begin to make a lot of sense. It will help you with that Red Pill you took.

What you should be realizing is that this year's DNC is the culmination of everything that happened during Bill Clinton's administration, and how he was able to escape from the political death trap he had created for himself. Hillary sacrificed herself by putting up with all the shenanigans, and her nomination is the reward that she gets for everything she put up with all those years. There were many meetings in smoke filled rooms with lots of books and whiskey glasses back in the 90's. Every important democrat did his part to convince Hillary that she had to stand up next to her husband, and that her solidarity with him would secure his place of power despite his penchant for beautiful interns and his ability to lie so convincingly. They had to give her something in return and this was it. It was all in a secret book passed down from DNC Chairman to DNC Chairman. HILLARY MUST WIN THE NOMINATION BECAUSE SHE DID EVERYTHING WE ASKED HER TO DO BACK IN THE 90's. And then it listed everything she did back in the 90's from giving Bill a hug to fetching coffee for his interns.

I could have told you this was going to happen after watching season 5 of the Good Wife.

Monday, February 22, 2016

A Theory About What's Really Going on in The Walking Dead


I was thinking about The Walking Dead universe the other day and season one and all the craziness Rick encountered when he woke up out of that coma in the first episode and this thought occurred to me: 
What if what's really going on is Rick actually died in that hospital in Episode 1, and now he's in a pre-hell kind of place with a bunch of other people who don't realize they died, but this place isn't hell like we know it, but its actually still earth, but its a different plane of existence, so all the zombies that they see are actually just normal selfish, dead, ugly souls of living people walking around here on earth, because that's how we look to someone who is walking around actually dead. Every time a zombie takes a head-shot, the person who's soul that represents in the real world actually becomes someone with a decent heart and a living spirit. Soooo in essence what Rick and his crew and anyone else trying to survive are actually doing is saving the whole human race from the same eternal damnation they are experiencing by helping them get to heaven.
Maybe just a stupid fan theory and possibly one that's already out there, but the thought just occurred to me today so I had to give it legs just in case in the series finale all gets revealed and I turn out to be right and Robert Kirkman gives me an award for figuring out the biggest twist in TV/Comic Book history.
 

Friday, January 1, 2016

Welcome 2016


     Things I'm excited about in 2016
1. Disney is releasing a Pete's Dragon movie
2. The U.S. presidential election
3. Hoverboards
4. Ultra HD broadcasts (4k)
5. The Superbowl and the 2016 Redskins
6. iPhone 7
7. The Olympics
8. Virtual Reality
9. Smart Cars
10. and Leap Day February 29th 

    People are becoming resolute today. Enrollment is up at the gym, and Phillip Morris is once again bracing for low numbers in January. I'm sure you've seen a multitude of "Year in Review" episodes, and you'll probably see many more, because you've already forgotten so much and want to see if others remember what you did. We can expect some things to happen, and yet there is also much anticipation for things we can't expect. 
     Last year gave us a boatload of record breaking cinema, bizarre entertainment news, and the beginning of an exciting presidential race. However, 2015 was also over-shadowed by horrific violence at the hands of dastardly people and organizations. As a world we were knocked down more times in one year than I can remember. I don't know if the actual statistics are up, or if I'm just noticing them more because I have a growing family to worry about.
    Despite the awesomeness, the sour notes, the useless cultural epithets and the things that made us laugh, 2015 is now history. Some things were recorded with graphic detail, others are a pixelated recollection. Events of the world and the days of our lives might become a vague memory while most things will be forgotten, yet I'm oddly hopeful.
     I hope this past year teaches our leaders and helps them grow wiser to the plans of evil doers, so we can thwart more villains and bring more peace. I hope generosity and gratitude increases, so the less fortunate become more hopeful and the more fortunate become more socially aware of injustice. I hope the weather systems balance and seasons change appropriately, so farmers can be confident in their crops and I don't have to pay so much for food. For my sake, I hope nostalgia in the arts continues, so I can continue to share my childhood with my own children. But for my children's sake, I hope that there is an increase in fresh, cool ideas and stories to build their own memories and experiences with. 
      I wish everyone out there strength to deal with the downs of the new year and humility to deal with the ups. 
--------------

Tuesday, September 15, 2015

The Language of Social Media




Facebook post: "Panda Express needs to get in my mouth"
Translation - "I'm hungry for some good food."

Facebook post: "This."
Translation: "I'm speechless" or "My vocabulary is not adequate enough to convey the emotion behind what I'm posting, so just click the link below to read an article or watch a video."

Facebook post: "That is all."
Translation: "."

Facebook post: "I wish there was a dislike button"
Translation: "I hate this, but I nervously laughed a little"

Facebook post: "I literally died."
Translation: "This was pretty funny, but I'm still alive."

Facebook post: "WTH"
Translation: "Here's something that happened that I find hard to believe; and also, in case you didn't know, I don't like to use extreme profanity."

Facebook post: "no comments please"
Translation: "I'm voicing my opinion about an issue that will make people upset, but I don't want to hear what you think, and I don't know how to disable comments on this post."

In the interest of a social study please feel free to add to this list or make any corrections to my observations

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

An Artistic Heavy Weight: Robin Williams


Aladdin, Dead Poet's Society, The Fisher King, Patch Adams, Good Will Hunting, Mork and Mindy, The Crazy Ones, only gave us a tiny glimpse into the artistic mind of Robin Williams. He was so much more than he showed us on camera. He was a titan in his industry, but he was a human. He struggled just like we do. He fought his demons just like we do. Sometimes he triumphed and sometimes he gave up, just like we do. I heard an interview with him on NPR, and it gave me a deeper glimpse into the person that hid behind the face. It's an interview he did with Terry Gross from NPR's Fresh Air. There is a lot of talk about the film he was promoting at the time but she really gets deep with him around 13:30 and at around the 30:20 mark they start talking about how depression affects funny people.

Saturday, August 9, 2014

The Business of Rat Races and Bacon

One score and fifteen years ago my father and mother brought forth upon this continent, a baby boy. He was to be groomed and trained for a survival game, if you will, making the world go round with the pitter-patter of his humungous little feet inside an unbeatable obstacle course that has been commonly referred to as The Rat Race. I am this boy, and I have been running this Rat Race for about 10 years now. It is tiring and upsetting and rewarding and exciting, but aside from all that it has been completely and totally irrelevant to life and by "completely and totally irrelevant " I mean "utterly and fundamentally irrelevant". It's almost as if it has been a facade to suck me away from the real reality that is really real. What is this reality, you ask? I'll tell you: The exquisite and yet delicate balance of the phenomenon known as BACON.

There is no such thing as money in my pocket, only bacon in my mouth.
There is no such thing as a name on my docket, only bacon in my mouth.
There is no such thing as a raise or a promotion, only bacon in my mouth.
There is no such thing as delays or demotions, only bacon in my mouth. 

I forget this truth so often and I'm here to echo a reminder through the maze of The Rat Race: STOP! ENJOY SOME BACON!
Don't let the world get you down