The Business of Rat Races and Bacon

One score and fifteen years ago my father and mother brought forth upon this continent, a baby boy. He was to be groomed and trained for a survival game, if you will, making the world go round with the pitter-patter of his humungous little feet inside an unbeatable obstacle course that has been commonly referred to as The Rat Race. I am this boy, and I have been running this Rat Race for about 10 years now. It is tiring and upsetting and rewarding and exciting, but aside from all that it has been completely and totally irrelevant to life and by "completely and totally irrelevant " I mean "utterly and fundamentally irrelevant". It's almost as if it has been a facade to suck me away from the real reality that is really real. What is this reality, you ask? I'll tell you: The exquisite and yet delicate balance of the phenomenon known as BACON.

There is no such thing as money in my pocket, only bacon in my mouth.
There is no such thing as a name on my docket, only bacon in my mouth.
There is no such thing as a raise or a promotion, only bacon in my mouth.
There is no such thing as delays or demotions, only bacon in my mouth. 

I forget this truth so often and I'm here to echo a reminder through the maze of The Rat Race: STOP! ENJOY SOME BACON!
Don't let the world get you down

S.A.T. Analogies (This is to that as...)

I've always been fascinated with analogies, in particular the ones we explored during those formative years taking our S.A.T.'s.
For example:
Orange is to Fruit as Cucumber is to ________
a. Looney Tunes
b. Flapjacks
c. Nastiness
d. Vegetable

This week I've composed a few analogies based on current events and other things I've come across this past week. Enjoy!

1. Women are to Baby Clothes (See last week's blog)



as Men are to bacon.





2. Eric Holder is to "Fast and Furious"



as Vin Diesel is to "The Pacifier".





3. Fox News is to a liberal


as a fish is to "out of water".





4. Jerry Sandusky is to Penn State



as Aquaman is to The Justice League.





5. PC's are to viruses



as Greece is to rioting.





6. "The Bachelorette" is to reality



as a cardboard box is to a home



7. The Stock Market is to a good investment



as a great white shark is to a good pet.




Have a great week, y'all.